Sunday, March 27, 2011

As I Stare At My Refection


Prelude  to a Prose

I have emptied my soul and allowed myself to
return to the dark pit of grief , temporarily...
I want you to know I am fine, after some tears of course.
The words below just poured out....
This prompt allowed me to
explain the raw numbing pain of loss....
This is how I felt in the first
months after my daughters funeral... perhaps years after.
Lacy, I will forever feel your Love.

                   

Dear Mirror
As I stare at my reflection
I see a stranger.
Sorrow has eaten me away, revealing a wraith-like shadow me, 
with coal-stained eyes deprived of sleep, a distressed washed-out,
tear- stained complexion, a withered sickly grossness that has
wrenched me through the looking glass of raw pain,
where I have vanished inside my own grief.
Feeling alone and fighting to stay present against the
bottomless black pit of despair, has used up all of my resolve.
My strength of will has no reserves.
I am a mere imitation of my former self, an impostor,
almost certainly unrecognizable by my friends and family.
Will this torment ever end?

                         
♥  © ஆεlεɳa
Challenge: Write a letter to the person you see in your mirror
      Poetry Prompt...Finish this line...For

11 comments:

  1. My Helena,
    Your grief pours through your words and empties deep into my heart ! I know it is still a very hard road you travel and I so wish I could carry all of the burden for you ... I know you are going to be fine, you have more strenght than most in the same situation.
    Just know, finding you and sharing with you are blessings I hold very dear , I hope in some way that will bring you comfort ... YOU ARE VERY SPECIAL TO ME !

    By the way...LOVE LOVE LOVE that typewriter with our blog name... THAT IS SO COOOOLLLL !!!!
    JL

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  2. Beautiful written can feel the ache and loss.
    May the Lord carry you througheach day and each step fo the way.
    Blessings

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  3. Many walk with you on your road! We may be virtual connections! We may seem invisible! But we are there! Believe it! You are not alone!

    Namaste!

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  4. It is interesting to me that one with such incredible depth as you...sees your reflection as empty...which is so contrary to the very depth, reflection and precision of your writing...All is not ever lost Helena...and will never be...remember that refrain in my writing Curfew..."Never shall she never give up...that is my prayer for you." Now you may see your reflection dimly...but I can assure you even in your grief...all the parts of you, including your daughter are letting out a bright light.

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  5. I am touched by all your loving words of compassion. ♥

    I have emptied my soul and allowed myself to
    return to the dark pit of grief , temporarily...
    I want you to know I am fine,
    after some tears of course.
    The words below just poured out....
    This prompt allowed me to
    explain the raw numbing pain of loss....
    This is how I felt in the first
    months after the funeral... perhaps years after.
    I have since found joy and accceptence and know that Love never dies....
    ♥ ஆεlεɳa

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  6. O the depths that you can reach are equaled by the heights that you can take us to through your written words. After reading this and the follow-up comments, now I, too, have a "tear-stained complexion". Chantelle will always be remembered through your sharing her - as well as her loss - with us. Thank you, for this, my dear Helena. You are so right! Love never dies...and Lacy has become a muse of inspiration for all who read your wondrous prose.

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  7. Helena,
    Thank-you so much for baring your soul for us. Though I do not know your loss, I feel it through your words. I know that words cannot erase the pain, but hopefully the kind words posted here will help alleviate your burden some. You are in my thoughts, dear!

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  8. Well done Helena, you have captured the feeling of isolation and lonliness one feels when you have lost someone you love. It is good to talk about these things. Death is the last taboo and should be talked about.
    I have experienced many emotions. Recently a friend of my daughter lost her 3 year old son (he died of cancer) and I felt so angry. Poor little boy he hadn't had a life.
    In time there is an acceptance, a warm glow of happy memories. As you say Love never dies. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.

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  9. I have just started following but you do a great job with your poems.

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  10. Dearest Helena, I love you for the depth of emotion and honesty you pour out in your blog posts. I can only begin to understand what it must feel like to be a parent sentenced to go on living with the absence of a child you love dearly. Certainly in changes one forever, and I think you did a beautiful job here of explaining how it feels from the inside looking out. You are always in my thoughts and prayers that time will continue to bring healing. I hope that you will share some happy memories of your daughter on Monday Memories as well. Tell us about the times that made you smile! HUGS

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  11. Thank you for this beautiful poem, Helena.

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